I'm going through a bit of a rough patch. It's vanilla and boring, so I wont get into all of that. It just really sucks and I have no outlet. I have to ride this roller coaster over and over not knowing when, or if I will be able to get off the ride.
It is during these moments that my spanking desires are at an all time high. Yes, I have my normal happy spanking thoughts, but lately much darker, more masochistic desires have been developing in my mind. I want to be spanked, yes, but I want it to hurt. I want my hair pulled, my arm grabbed. I want to be roughly held down as the spanking begins. I want a cane slashing, belt cracking scene where I feel something other than what I have been feeling.
Most importantly is "I want to feel something other than what I have been feeling."
The annual FMS Tropical Beach Party is coming up soon. Unfortunately, we will have to miss this year due to a vanilla commitment. I am bummed because I always have a great time and many of my favorite people will be there. It would have provided with me the chance to get the snot beaten out of me too. ;-)
I am lucky that I am married to a spanko, so I do get play more than most. However, anything and anyone attached to the vanilla issue would end up putting me in a different head space and I would not be able to escape the issue.
I guess my whiny post comes down to these questions. Have any of you spanked or have been spanked just to escape your problem for a while? Have you been ever played rough just to feel something other than what you have been feeling?
Can someone hurry up and invent a teleportation device already?
I will miss you SOO much at FMS but you have heard me say that lots and lots, so this is not news.
ReplyDeleteI have absolutely craved and received what Dave calls "Catharsis Spankings". I've received them when I was down about one thing or another, upset about something beyond my control, stressed out of my mind planning our wedding, and once when I had horrific wisdom tooth pain. Sometimes the physical pain and submission lets you get out of your own head for a bit and release all of that pent up emotion.
xoxo
~Stacy
I will miss you sooo much too. :(
DeleteI can relate to the wedding planning spanking, LOL. However, Pubsie preferred to call it "spanking the bridezilla away!" ;)
I understand. some of my spankings delivered by Andrea's "T" have been the epitome of stress release spanking. Stop. Breathe. Feel. Cry. And then I feel better. T (and Andrea) is privy to much of my personal life, and letting go with someone you can trust with secrets can be very cathartic. It doesn't make what's wrong go away, but I do believe it helps me deal with it.
ReplyDeleteRed xx
I love that Red. It is great to be able to trust people that share our kink so much that they know us. The REAL us. It's a much powerful connection in my opinion.
DeleteYes. Sometimes the pain delivers me out of my head, if I'm stuck there. Sometimes, I just want the intensity, so I won't focus on what's bothering me. Sometimes, real life sucks. A spanking doesn't change what's going on, but it takes me out of it for a brief time, distracts me, calms me.
ReplyDeleteAnd that damned teleportation device is way overdue. Either that, or they need to figure out how to fold the damn country in half so we can go from coast to coast in minutes.
I agree with sometimes just wanting the intensity. I know it wont make problems go away, but for the time being I just want to forget and feel something else. :)
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