Creating the Perfect Vanilla Chocolate Swirl

I am very fortunate.  :)  Not too long after finally admitting to myself that I am in fact a spanko, I met the man I would eventually marry.  We had been talking on Myspace (remember myspace?) and he was going to come to my area.  We met for lunch, I took him on an hike that he was not prepared for (oppps), and we had our first spanking on top of a mountain with one of the prettiest views that one can only see from the top of a mountain summit.

It remains one of my most memorial spanking experiences.

As we realized that day (and the weeks and months that followed), we had a chemistry that we could not deny.  We were more than just play partners, we were soul mates.  He is my best friend, my lover, my husband, my equal, and my top.

I know people are wondering, "how can he be both your equal AND your top?"

When we first moved in together, I remember getting comments like, "your butt must be red ALL the time," and "you NEED someone 24/7 to fix your behavior!"  The first one I smiled at, the second one kind of insulted me, but both comments are not true.

Don't misunderstand me, we enjoy spanking play in our marriage, but the best part is we enjoy it as an activity that we both enjoy mutually.  If I don't feel like playing, we don't.  If he doesn't feel like playing, we don't.  We are equal.  I am happy to submit to his needs and he is happy to provide me with mine.

When we started out, our relationship was focused on play, play, play!  We were living in different states and could only see each other about once a month (if we were lucky maybe twice a month!).  Our visits would be weekend long plays to fulfill our needs.  When I moved closer to him, a funny thing started to happen.

Spanking wasn't the only thing in our relationship.

Our vanilla life slowly started to sneak into our play time.  We met each other's families.  We met each other's vanilla friends.  We dodged questions on how we met and let several different stories form, all of which we just smiled and nodded at in agreement.  "Why yes!  We did meet each other at the beach." "I heard that she picked him up at a bar."  "I think they used match.com!"

Oh how little did they know.  ;)

We panicked a little when we got married.  Our wedding was a huge fanfare that included both of our (ridiculously large) families, friends, and a handful of people we had met and become close friends with in the scene.  Do we put a "how we met" story on our wedding website?  Do we let people just talk?  Do we answer the "how you met question" if someone asks?

We decided to just avoid the situation completely.  Surprisingly, that worked out perfectly!

Where spanking is still a huge part of our lives and our relationship, it is no longer the predominate factor.  We support each other through the ups and downs that life throws at us.  I love him and he is my everything.

The best part?  We both understand our freaky, kinky needs.

Do you have a spanking relationship that mixes in with the vanilla world?  Do you want a relationship that combines both worlds?  Do you find it hard to keep your spanking needs secret?  Do you feel the need to hide your kinky relationships?  Please feel free to share.  :)